Chibi Nightheart: Hello! Welcome to the MSTing of Episode 46! Why choose just episode 46? Well, it's one of my favorites, that and it was the funniest MSTing that Nikki and I have done. So for the sake of clarity, let us all say that all asides are being iserted by some unknown outside force who does a wicked mimic of the cast's voices. Or you can go ahead and pretend that it's the cast themselves (it's much funnier that way). Either way, enjoy! ~Nightheart.

OH, and i would like to take this opportunity to mention that I do not own Gundam wing. I do not own most of the script. The only thing I own are the comments that I have so cunninly distributed throughout the fic. All the rest belongs to bandai and sotsu agency. That said, on with the show!

((The wordds in these are inserted words.))

Episode 46: Milliard's Decisive Battle

Treize Khushrenada who reverted back to OZ ascended to the position of world sovereign, accomplishing the reunification of the conglomerate and the former federation's earthbound forces.

((Trieze: I'm the king of the world!))

While the White Fangs, declaring independance, completed the giant spaceship Libra. Their commander, Milliardo Peacecraft, seeking to remove the Earth, begins an all out war with Trieze's earth forces.

((Milliardo: *does Marvin the Martian impression* I'm going to blow up the Earth.))

AC 195.... The gundam pilots, affiliated with no side, continue their fight. While on the horizon, the greatest battle of humankind unravels.

Quatre: We won't let the data she brought us go to waste.

Duo: Yeah....

Duo: Heero... it looks like Relena Peacecraft is on the Libra.

Heero: Relena?

Duo: Yeah.... Seems that Hilde met her there.

((Heero: I uh, gotta go this way now...*runs off*))

Heero heading to Wing Zero... Heero: *Relena*

Relena: (Staring out into space) *Heero*

((Relena: John...))

((Heero: Marsha...))

Episode 46 - Milliard's Decisive Battle

Narrator:The earth having been targetted by the giant ship, Libra, forced the military to use their superior resources to formulate a counteroffensive. The resource satellite MO-II being the closest to the earth, became the staging point for several thousand space-type Leos. Treize in an attempt to bolster morale of his troops, took his place with those on the front-lines. But there were still voices of doubt about how well they could stand up against the Libra.

Treize stands there regarding the Tallgeese MK-II

Soldier: Milord Treize, it's too dangerous to use our entire line in the attack.

Treize: The commander of the White Fang, Milliardo, is fighting with all his forces. Think of this as a courtesy to him.

((Treize: If he can do it, then dammit so can I! Only Better! I shall prove to have the most testosterone! Bwahahaha!))

Soldier: But....

Treize: Mark my words, A war without such courtesies creates nothing but slaughter.... That's why all the wars that have happened on earth have been so sad.

((Trieze: Now that we're up here in space, even though we'll still technically be slaughtering people, it won't be as sad.))

[Lady Une lying comatose in hospital bed]

((Lady Une: You wouldn't belive it, but two wine coolers and I'm buzzed. Anybody got any asprin?))

[Switch to Hangar Bay]

Mechanic: Chief.... isn't that the suit that was abandoned at Luxemborg?

Chief: Yeah... but it's still a marvelous unit.

Mechanic: But his lordship, Treize's already gone up into space. What's the point in mounting boosters?

((Chief: What's the point?! Geeze! Kids these days! Always so damn lazy! They don't want to mount boosters, they don't want to get coffee, they don't want to have our sex filmed by midgets... it's always complain, complain, complain!))

Chief: I don't leave things half finished.

Mechanic: Still... there's no one left on this earth capable of piloting this suit....

[Giant Battleship Peacemillion]

Duo floats down one of the corridors and ends up in the mess hall.

Duo: Where'd he go off to, that Heero?

((Duo: That darned Heero, He's always running off. Always leaving ME to cover the check... Damn him.))

Trowa: (reading a book) He took off in a Virgo carrier recovered from the White Fang. It's obvious where he's headed.

((Trowa: He's going to the mall, they're having a sale on spandex.))

Duo: But, he left behind the Zero! Does he plan on facing Zechs with his bare hands?

Wufei doing some exercises with some weird hand-held device.

Wufei: I don't know how, but he'll manage it somehow....

((Wufei: Facing Zechs with his bare hands, that is. He's not going to face him with his eyes or his feet, nope. It's got to be with his hands.))

Quatre: (smiling softly) No, I don't think that's his only purpose.

Duo: Hey, you can't mean that he went off to rescue that girl?

((Duo: No specific girl...just that one. Or maybe it was THAT one...))

Quatre: Yes.

((Quatre: It was THAT girl as opposed to just that one.))

Wufei: Then I've been giving him too much credit.... Out of all of us, I thought he was the sanest guy.

((Duo: *sweatdrop* You've got to be kidding. Quatre on the Zero System is saner than Heero is normally.))

((Quatre: Hey! I resent that!))

Trowa: I think it just goes to show you how strong she really is, if she can influence a guy like Heero.

((Trowa: Either that, or it's the mini-skirt. Don't tell anyone I told you this, but Heero secretly has a thing for mini-skirts.))

Wufei: *snort*

((But she's WEAK! Only Wufei is strong for Wufei is justice and everyone else is WEAK! Weak I say! *starts going into an apoleptic attack*))

((Duo: *Sweatdrops* Oookaaay. Someone forgot their medication this morning.))

Trowa: Wufei.... When Heero brings Relena back, at least greet her kindly... It's so easy to hurt a woman's feelings.

((Trowa: Hell, you do it all the time without even trying. I stand in awe. Most of them won't talk to you and of the few that will, half are secretly plotting to kill you. Out of them all, I think Sally has the best odds, she's got all those machine guns and...))

Wufei: (grimly silent) ......

((WuFei: I've suddenly been struck dumb.))
((Everyone else: Yay! Yay! Hooray!))

Duo: Hey Quatre... If we're going to go after him, shouldn't we head out now?

((Duo: *whining*I wanna go toooooo! Heero always gets to have all the fun! And HIS woman's still conscious!))

Quatre: We can't afford to deplete the defenses of the Peacemillion right now.... Besides, let's leave the two of them alone for a while.

((Quatre: *smiling obliviously* They'll be having tea and scones together.))

((Duo: Yeah. Sure they will Quatre.))

((Quatre: *innocently* Why? What else would they be doing?))

((*Duo and Trowa exchange look.* *Duo hides grin*))

Duo: You guys really think he's going to pull it off?

((Duo: I mean, being on a battle ship that size in the middle of a war doesn't exactly afford many chances for privacy.))

Duo: He has failed before!

((Duo: Yes, he's failed to pick up the check!))

[Damaged Virgo Carrier headed towards Libra]

Heero: This is the Peacemillion attack unit 02.... Propulsion power defense system hit on the port side, coming in for an emergency landing.

((Heero: Hee hee hee! I get to crash a shuttle! Bada boom boom!))

Comm: This is the Libra bridge. Please confirm the number of survivors. Identification numbers- Heero: There are no survivors...

((Heero: They're all floating lifeless in space right now, I had to get them out of my new shuttle. You can send the bill care of Duo Maxwell.))

Heero cuts off communications and flies the carrier straight into one of the hangars.

Comm: Hey! Wait! Open up communications! Hey!

((Comm: I'll uh, have to ask my manager.))

Man1: Careful! It's very possible that there's a saboteur in there. Status on the fire? Man2: We're working on it! Our hands are full!

((Man1: Ummm, Man2? That is NOT the fire hose you're squeezing!))

Someone floats out of the carrier.

Man1: Hey you! Seal off this block! No one gets out.

Heero: Rodger.....

((Heero: Actually, Bob! Rodger's busy right now.))

Libra bridge.... Quinze: You let an infiltrator slip through!? Fools! You let it happen again? I told you to be ready for this!!

((Quinze: You are as incompetent as I am!))

Zechs: Calm down. I was prepared for this eventuality.... But it came sooner than I'd anticipated.

((Milliardo: Stupid little scrub-boy, making moves on my poor innocent little sister...He will not live out this battle!))

Quinze: Huh? Zechs: I suppose I should say that the gundam pilots live up to their name.

((Zechs: Yes. They pilot Gundams.))

Dorothy: What do you have in mind, Mister Milliardo?

Zechs: As long as they've made their presence known, there's nothing but for me to make mine known. Dorothy: But there's been no confirmation of the infiltrator yet.

((Dorothy: Besides what that idiot Quinze just said about an infiltrator getting through, there hasn't been any confirmation.))

Zechs: It has to be him.... Heero Yuy.

((Milliardo: I know this because...I am a Gundam pilot. Yes. I live up to my name and...I pilot a Gundam!))

[Relena's Room] Relena is staring out the window.

((Relena: Is that my cue to stare out the window?))

Relena: ...... (The sound of door opening. Relena continues to stare at the window.)

Relena: I have nothing to say to anyone but my elder brother..... Please, there's no need to worry about me......

Heero: (off camera) I can't allow that.

((Heero: I can't allow anyone to worry about you but ME.))

Relena: ......!! (She looks pretty happy) Heero stands at the door.

Heero: With you here, Noin and the others are shaken in their resolve.

((Heero: Apparently, I'm really the only one who wants to kill you. Well, Wufei seems to be considering it...))

Relena: I'd have never thought that you would come for me, Heero.

((Relena: How the hell'd you find the room? I mean, this place is pretty big and Dorothy seems to have locked me in one of the more obscure rooms on this spinning tin can...))

Heero: (turning to leave) Let's go...

((Heero: No particular place, just...go.))

Relena: Wait! I still...

((Relena: I still have another weeks worth of reservations for this room! They don't come cheap you know.))
((Heero: Wellll, since you offered...))

Heero: Zechs?

((Relena: Sex? Don't mind if I do.))

Heero: Do whatever you need....

((Heero: Please, go right ahead.))

Heero: I have matters to settle with him as well.

((Relena: Eeew.))

Heero leaves first, followed by a smiling Relena.

((Relena: Hee hee hee. Nice ass. *gasps* So THAT's where you hide that gun!))

[Tallgese MK-II standing on a carrier with a horde MS's behind it.]

OZ: Coordinates adjusted. Target. Libra.

((OZ: I am the great and powerful OZ.))

[Inside a computer room aboard the Libra]

Relena: What are you doing? (leans against the panel to face him)

Heero: That girl, Hilde..... The data she brought us on this ship is of some use.... he's apparently not on the bridge at the moment.....

((Heero: *glancing over* *thinks* Ooooh. Mini-skirt! Woo-hoo! I can almost see her- *shakes himself out of it* Mind off the female.))

Relena: Where is my brother?

((Relena: I want to complain about their lousy room service!))

Heero: He can only be in one of several places.

Relena: You truly are a wonder, Heero...

Heero: I'm nothing compared to you...

((Heero: *thinking* Especially in that mini-skirt!))

Relena: No, you give me the strength and hope to live... you must do the same for others...

Heero: Don't make me repeat myself.... I'm nothing compared to you....

(a.n. Now that's the way to compliment a girl!)

Relena: ... I-!

((Heero: You, you, you! It's all about you! What about my needs?! You never take me out anymore! It's always all about you!))

Heero: Come. I've found Zechs.

(monitor highlights a round room)

((Heero: Well, it looks like they told him to go piss in the corner.))

Relena: What?!

((Relena: I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. I was too busy admiring your...Well nevermind.))

[Somwhere on the Libra]

Zechs: So you finally show yourself.

((Milliardo: Come out cad and I shall defend my sisters honor to the death!))
((Relena: *rolls eyes* I thought we talked about this.))

Relena: Brother!

Zechs: Relena... I thought our conversation was over.

Relena: No. Not yet.

((Relena: Obviously not. I'm still here talking to you aren't I?))

Zechs: I will not change my mind.

[Monitor flares to life showing the OZ attack force.]

Zechs: This is what Treize is doing. The Libra must take on this huge armada.

Relena: Stop this immediately. It's meaningless!

Zechs: No it's not. Even if this was only a cowardly offensive, there's more than enough meaning in it.

Relena: Brother....

Heero: I don't know what's going on between Treize and you, but don't involve others.

((Heero: I really don't want to know what's going on between you two. And I don't think you should either!))

Zechs: This war must, by it's nature, involve many others.... This problem is related to the hope of all mankind.

((Zechs: Besides, Daddy never got me a pony! *points at Relena* You got a pink car! All I ever got was a stupid mask! *pouts*))

Heero: Is this why you, an Earther became a representative to the colonies?

Zechs: The colonies toyed with the will to fight, and continued the path to arms.... Chose me as their leader.... If you have problems with that, then you as a native of the colonies should take command of the White Fang.

Zechs:In other words.... become my comrade.

[Commercial Break]

Dorothy: At long last... Mister Treize?

Quinze: Lady Dorothy.... The Libra's units are ready and the main array has finished charging...

Dorothy: Let's wait for Mister Milliardo.

Quinze: But at this rate....

Dorothy: We are to be following Mister Milliardo's orders. Are we not?

Quinze: True... but...

((Quinze: *mutters* Bitch.))

((Dorothy: *narrows eyes* I heard that. From now on you shall refer to me only as Your Dark Goddess! <whipcrack! Is that clear?! ))

((Quinze: Yes Mistress.))

((Dorothy: Now get down on your knees and beg. <Whipcrack!))

[Back to Heero and Zechs]

Heero: Comrade? ..... It figures.... You would say something like that.

((Heero: Do I get a free car if I say yes?))

Heero raises the gun and aims it at Zechs.

((Heero: And I want those fuzzy dice to hang in the mirror with that. And oh yeah... I'm taking your sister with me.))
((Relena: Next time, YOU be the hood ornament!))

Zechs: Is that your answer?

((Zechs: *does Regis Philbin Impression* Is that your final answer?))

((Heero: I'd like to use my lifeline.))

Heero: Does the person who finds so much meaning in this war have something to say?

((Zechs: Heero...I am your father.))

((Heero: You are?))

((Zechs: No, not really. I can’t back that up.))

Zechs: Unless one fights, one cannot realise the stupidity of war.... I must make all of humankind realise this.

Heero: Why have you chosen to fill that role?

((Heero: 'cause well, you really suck at it. I'd bet you that not even one year later they'll be back to fighting again.))

Zechs: The former leader of the colonies, Heero Yuy, with the head of the Cinque Kingdom attempted to establish complete peace.

Zechs: One in space.... the other on the earth.

Relena: Father-?

Zechs: I am merely following my father's will.

Relena: Father's will?! You're saying that this battle... this miserable war will bring about the complete peace that the Cinque Kingdom advocates?

Zechs: That is correct.

((Zechs: What've we got for 'em Johnny?))

Relena: No, you're wrong. Peace cannot be born out of fighting!

Zechs: And that's fine..... Keep thinking that....

((Zechs: *soothingly* That's riight, you go right on thinking that. It's not true...but that's okay.))

Heero: (lowering gun) Understood....

Heero: (To Relena) That's enough isn't it? Your role in this is over.

((Heero: We won't be needing you anymore so, I can just go ahead and shoot you now.))

[Heero turns to leave.]

Relena: Heero!

((Relena: Damn it! You never wait up! Always have to rush out of the room.))

Zechs: Relena..... No matter what happens.... survive through this.... Farewell, sister of mine.

[His image fades.]

Relena: Brother! .... A holographic projection?

[Relena going after Heero]

Relena: (very distressed) Heero!?

((Relena: Can't they please give me some better dialougue?! It's always Heero this and Heero that. Scriptwright!!))

[Zechs stepping back onto the Libra's bridge.]

Quinze: Enemy units are in range. Zechs: The charge on the main array?

Dorothy: Complete. But... they're comprised of mobile suits....

Zechs: Of course... I'll send out an advisory. But depending on Treize's response, we may have to fire. I want to eliminate all sentimentality when dealing with him.

Dorthy: U-Understood....

[Back to the earth forces]

Comm: M'lord, An advisory has come in, it's from Commander Milliardo of the White Fang. He says that if we continue the advance, he'll fire the Libra array.

Treize: Acknowledged.

[Tallgeese's arm is raised signaling halt.]

Treize: This is Treize Khushrenada. All troops halt.

[Treize glances around.]

((Treize: That means stop by the way.))

Treize: Stand by, until I order otherwise.

[Tallgeese jets off towards the Libra.]

OZ: Your lordship!? Where are you going!? Wait! M'lord!!!

((OZ: You forgot your rose fragranced stationary M'lord!))

[Back on earth, Lady Une suddenly awakens.]

((Lady Une: Oh shit! I'm late for the war!))

WF1: Special enemy unit approaching.

((WF1: This one has an exceptionally long feather in his hat.))

Quinze: Launch Libra's units!

Zechs: Belay that order!

Quinze: Commander Milliardo....?

Zechs: That's the Tallgeese.... and the pilot is most likely....

Treize: (on screen) This is the world sovereign, Treize Khushenada. I challenge the White Fang's leader, Commander Milliardo to a duel.

Quinze: A duel?! How very OZ.

WF1: Is he serious?

WF2: Yes. That's his usual method.

Dorthy: Master Treize...

Zechs: Hmph.

[Back on earth.... Une's bed is empty.]

[Mechanics are running and stop to watch a white streak head up into space.]

[Treize before the giant spaceship Libra. (in Tallgeese MK-II)]

Treize: Will you give me your answer.... Commander Milliardo?

Zechs: (on monitor) .....

((Zechs: Piss off!))

((White Fang Soldiers: How shall we piss off, oh Lord?))

((Zechs: Not you! Him!))

Treize: Try not to forget that your answer will include your response regarding this battle.

Zechs: The duel ...

Treize: .....

Zechs: Is declined!

Dorthy: What?!

Treize: *amused sound*

Dorothy: W-Why.... Mister Milliardo?

Zechs: I'm not an "OZ" soldier.... I am in a position where the code of knights does not matter.... I bear the will of the space revolution!!

((Zechs: *singing* And all we want to do is Dance! Dance!))

Zechs: I can't allow such a frivolous thing as a duel to decide the fate of the colonists.

((Treize: i quite agree. We should flip for it!))
((Milliardo: No, no. Twister is the only way to resolve this conflict.))

Treize: (eyes closed) I see.... That is the correct choice.

((Treize: you win a stuffie.))

Zechs: Treize.... those who stand in the way will be removed!!

Treize: Milliardo... Behind us is the earth...We will not retreat.

((OZ Soldiers: Run away! Run Away!))

Treize: I love the earth...

Zechs: That's what makes you Treize.

((Milliardo: Don't get me wrong, that's also the reason I have to kill you, but it's nothing personal.))

Dorothy: Please wait, Mister Milliardo!

((Dorothy: Here, let me do it! Auntie Griselda always did love him best!))

Zechs: Prepare the main array for firing... Target, enemy mobile suits spread to include the resource satellite MO-II.

Quinze: Use the main array on the Tallgeese?!

Zechs: It doesn't matter.... it's what Treize wants!!

((Milliardo: Yes. He wants me to shoot him out of the sky!))

Dorothy: (standing in front of Zechs) Mister Milliardo, please reconsider!! Please, anything but don't fire upon Trieze!

Zechs: Quinze... restrain Dorothy. She's a traitor.

Quinze: Yes.

((Quinze: Finally! I never liked her much.))

[Quinze points a gun at Dorthy.]

Dorothy: ..... Mister Milliardo.

[Back to the Tallgeese MK-II]

Treize: Forward!

((Treize: Onward men!))

[Puts the thrusters on full.]

WF: Enemy unit approaching!

Zechs: (thinking) It ends here, Trieze!

((Zechs: The buck stops here.))

WF: Main array, charging complete!

Treize: If I die here, your victory is assured. Fire at me! For the sake of peace on the colonies and earth!

((Treize: *impersonates Relena* Yes, yes! please come and kill me!))

Zechs: My enemy is the earth.... and you're it's representative.... Treize!

((Milliardo: I nver did like that planet much.))

WF: Countdown Initiated. Zechs: Move over. I'll finish him myself.

[Man moves out of seat and Zechs takes his place.]

[Zechs begins to push down on the button.]

Dorothy: (throwing herself at Zechs) No! No! Don't!

((Dorothy: Take me instead!))

Zechs: Don't get in my way! This is the path to peace!

[Zechs pushes and fires.]

[A rapidly approaching object, resolves itself into Gundam Wing bird-mode. It transforms and pushes Treize out of the way of the shot.]

Zechs: 01?!

Treize: Wing Gundam?!.... It can't be....

[The beam cuts a big hole through the earth forces and takes out a chunk of MO-II.]

[Back to a really mutilated Wing Gundam. The hatch is forced open and woman steps out (in an astrosuit of course) Treize gasps in surprise.]

Treize: Lady.... Une.....

((Treize: Glad to see you're feeling better there, Une. You're not mad about that whole split personality thing are you?))

[Libra's bridge]

Dorothy: Mister Milliardo....

Zechs: That's enough... Don't say a thing.

((Milliardo: Go to your room young lady!))

Quinze: How long until the array can be fired a second time?

WF1: One-hundred and fourty minutes are necessary for the charge.

WF2: Mobile Suits approaching from behind! They're.... earth forces! We're being targeted from both directions!

Quinze: Shit! Launch the Libra's units.

Quinze: (little snidely) You don't mind do you... Commander Milliardo?

[Zechs remains silent, shaking with anger.]

[Back to Treize and Lady Une]

[Lady Une floats up from the ruins of Wing Gundam and lands on Tallgeese's hand.]

((Treize: You like it here. *puts her in huge birdcage*)) (reference to that thing with the birds earlier in the season.)

Treize: Lady.... Why such recklessness?

Une: Master Treize... a battle is most beautiful when it's being fought.

Treize: To all units.... Shoot down the Libra!

((Treize: And bring me a latte and a mocha frap for my lady. And dammit men, get the Lady a blanket! She's probably freezing out there.))

[Earth force Leo's launch. Libra's Virgo's launch. Lotsa MS's!]