A little silly R+1 ficcie.  I had a lot
of fun writing this.  I hope you enjoy!


Cinderella - a silly GW rendition

by Sachie 

Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a boy named Heero.  He
lived in a cottage with his father Odin, and they were very happy together. 
But one day, Odin went into the forest to hunt, and he was hit by a falling
boulder and died.  The orphaned Heero was taken in by a distant relative,
who for some odd reason, called himself J.  J had two sons, Duo and Quatre. 
J and his sons were very cruel to Heero.  J would make Heero do all the
heavy work around the house (except he called it training).  The boys were
supposed to share the cooking and cleaning chores, but Duo and Quatre
bullied Heero into doing it all.  He never had any time to laugh or play,
and at night, when he finally finished all his chores, he would fall into an
exhausted heap by the cinders of the fireplace.  He became covered in soot,
because he was too tired and too busy to bathe often, and Duo and Quatre
mocked him for it. 

"Cinderella!"  They hurled insults at him all day long.  "Scullery maid! 
Errand boy!  Ugly, dirty Cinderella!"

He was so miserable, everyday he wished for his own death.  At least once he
was dead, he'd be free of those cruel taunts, and he'd be able to rest.

The prince ..er... princess of the land was a very nice girl named Relena. 
On the event of her fifteenth birthday, the King decided it was high time
she found someone to marry.  Relena wasn't dating anyone, and didn't know
very many boys that might make good husbands, so the King declared all the
eligible young bachelors would be invited to a grand ball, where the
Princess could get to know them.  

Immediately all the young boys in the land were thrown into a tizzy. 
Eligible bachelors all around started washing their hair, cleaning behind
their ears, polishing their shoes and pressing their best shirts and
trousers.

"A grand ball," thought Heero to himself as he ironed Quatre's fourteenth
pink shirt.  "I wonder what its like to go to a ball.  It sounds like so
much fun.  I wonder if there's lots of food to eat."  His stomach growled. 
He hadn't eaten any breakfast, or dinner the night before either.  There
just hadn't been any time.

"Hey, quit your slacking!" said Duo.  "I need ten of my shirts ironed today!
Get moving!"  Then he gave Heero a kick.

"You forgot to starch my shirts, you ignorant slut!"  Quatre screamed.  He
threw the clean shirts at Heero.  "Get it right this time!"

Duo began chanting  "Cinder-slut! Cinder-slut!"  while Heero did his best to
hold back his tears.

There was no way that Heero would be able to go to the ball.  Even though
all the eligible bachelors were invited, he didn't have the proper formal
clothes or even dress shoes, and he didn't have the time or the money to get
fitted for new clothes.  He could show up, dressed in his usual rags and his
face all covered with black soot, but the guard would probably throw him out
for insulting the Princess. 

"Maybe if I ask really nicely, J will let me put off some of the chores so
that I could get ready," he thought hopefully.  But all his hopes were
dashed when J took one look at the patio deck of the house they lived in and
said, "Heero, you are going to have to rebuild this deck, its virtually
rotting away!  That will be your new mission.  And do it immediately. Winter
is coming."

"Ninmu ryokai," said Heero, and swallowed bitter disappointment.

And so poor Heero toiled away, sewing on buttons and polishing shoes for Duo
and Quatre's outfits for the ball, rebuilding the deck, and all the while
keeping up his other chores of housekeeping and maintenance.

The night of the grand ball was a cool crisp autumn evening full of bright
stars.  Heero said goodbye to J, Duo and Quatre as they left for the castle.

"And don't forget to scrub the kitchen floors, Cinder-slut!" yelled Duo as
the hired carriage pulled away.

Heero sighed and trudged down to the nearby stream to get water to scrub the
floors.  The stream was quiet and deserted, and insects chirped quietly in
the grass,  As Heero dipped his wooden bucket into the cold water, hot tears
began to flow down his cheeks.  He briefly wondered how difficult it might
be to drown himself in the  shallow stream.

"But I can't," said Heero.  "I have a mission.  I must scrub the kitchen
floor."

"Well, aren't you the little dedicated housekeeper-boy!"

He looked up at the sound of a voice to see a tiny sparkly person hovering
in the air above him.  The person looked like a male, but he was dressed in
a sequined tube top and scandalously tight leopard print pants.  A pink
feather boa was wrapped around his neck, and his makeup was to die for,
girlfriend.  Oh yeah, he had glossamer fairy wings too.

"Who are you?" said Heero.

"Why, honey-love, I'm your fairy godmother!" said the quee... um... very odd
person, as he flipped his longish bangs out of his face with a perfectly
manicured hand.

"God..mother?" thought Heero.  But all he said out loud was: "Oh. Nice to
meet you."

"Is that all you have to say?" the person calling himself Heero's fairy
godmother pressed immaculately  rouged lips together in a pout.  "I'm here
to make your fondest wish come true!"  He waved his hands in the air and
sparkles flew all around him.

"You've come to kill me?"

"No!  Nitwit!  I've come to take you to the grand ball!"

Heero gasped as bright sparkles attached themselves to him, they clustered
so close together, that Heero could not see his own body underneath.  It
didn't hurt at all, but it was very strange to see.  When the sparkles
faded, he looked at his hands and saw that all the grime and soot were
gone.  Even the dirt under his fingernails was gone.  And his nails were
painted a pretty pearl pink.  He looked down at himself and saw he was
wearing a shimmery mauve ball gown with a flounced hem, real pearl buttons
and lace trim.  On his feet were rhinestone-studded glass slippers.

"You look fabulous!" gushed the fairy godmother clapping his hands.

"Thanks... but... um... I'd rather be wearing man's clothes," said Heero.

"Picky-picky!" The fairy stuck his tongue out at Heero, but the dress faded,
and was replaced by a silk shirt under a handsome tailored evening jacket,
matching pants and snazzy looking dress shoes so polished that Heero could
see his own face reflected in them.  "I look even fancier than Duo or
Quatre!" thought Heero.  "No one will turn me away at the gates if I go like
this!"  He was about to express his thanks and hurry off when the fairy
stopped him.

"I'm not done yet!  When you go to a party, you've got to go in style,
sweetie!" He poked at a wild gourd growing by the stream. The gourd began to
grow in size until it was as large as a carriage.  Then handles and wheels
sprouted out of is shiny golden skin and it was a carriage.  For horses, the
fairy pointed at two field mice who turned into a pair of dapple gray mares
with longish whiskers.  One of the horses squeaked.  An iridescent black
beetle and a brown toad were recruited as driver and footman respectively.

"There you go, sugar," said the fairly. "Go have a marvelous time!"

"I can't thank you enough," said Heero.

"Well, you can't," the fairy smirked.  " So stop thanking me and just go."

Heero climbed inside the pumpkin carriage (which was upholstered in
off-white and had very comfortable cushioned seats) and set off to attend a
royal ball for the first time in his life.

"Did I forget something?" said the fairy after Heero had left.  "Hmm?  Oh
well."  He shrugged, and with wink and a flick of his wrist, disappeared
into the night air.

Princess Relena was standing outside the door of her castle, greeting each
guest as they came into the courtyard, asking their names and shaking their
hands.  Some of the guest came on foot, some rode their own horses, and some
were brought in by fancy gilded carriages.  All of the young men she greeted
were handsome and well-dressed, but none of them had sparked her interest in
the slightest.  She was just greeting J and his two evil sons when a
marvelous carriage that looked like it had grown out of the ground pulled
into the courtyard.  No one there had every seen anything like it, and many
stared in open amazement.

"Look at the liveried footman and driver, dressed so well!  And the
beautiful horses!" They all exclaimed. "What exotic princeling is visiting
our own Kingdom?"

Duo and Quatre were just as eager as anyone else to scope out this
mysterious rival.  When the footman opened the door and Heero stepped out,
their jaws hit the ground.  Not because they recognized Heero (they didn't),
but because they knew that Heero was by far the handsomest, spiffiest,
knock-down drag-out sexiest bachelor  at the grand ball.  And they both
gnashed their teeth in bitter defeat. 

The Princess had come to the exact same conclusion and was staring at Heero
unabashedly.  She promptly went up to greet Heero and personally escorted
him to the ballroom, much to the chagrin and disappointment of all the other
boys in the line waiting to shake her hand. 

As for Heero, he felt like he was living in a dream.  The royal Princess
herself had come out to meet him!  He passed by Duo and Quatre, and
stiffened in apprehension, but they only stared at him as he walked by.  The
royal ballroom was lit with thousands upon thousands of candles and torches,
reflected in the smooth polished marble floor.  Musicians played on one side
of the hall, and some couples were dancing.  Relena lead Heero to the middle
of the floor and they began to dance.

The lights, the music, the gorgeous hall, the swish and swirl of  rich
fabric, and the feel of Princess Relena's gloved hand nestled in his own; it
was all too much for Heero. "Its so beautiful!  Everything is so beautiful. 
I never knew a night could be so happy!" He smiled for the first time since
his father had died, and the Princess smiled back.

The King watching the young couple smiled too.  He was sure that he was
getting a new son-in-law.

"Heero," said the Princess.  "You are the most wonderful boy I've ever met. 
Would you marry me and be my prince?"

"Will I have to clean the ballroom floor, and do the laundry?" asked Heero.

"No!" said Relena, shocked.

"Will I have to rebuild the back patio?"

"Of course not. My castle doesn't even have a back patio."

"Will I have to cook dinner and chop firewood?"

"Never. You'll live with me in the castle, and my servants and maids will do
all those things."

"I'll marry you!" said Heero.

But just then, the clock struck twelve.  And to Heero's utter dismay, the
fairy godmother's magic unraveled in a puff of smoke. Heero was left
standing in the middle of  the royal ball room, dressed in rags,
soot-smudges covering his face.

Duo and Quatre immediate recognized him and let out simultaneous howls of
rage.

"Its Heero!"

"The Cinder-slut!"

Heero felt his face burn with shame.  He was sure that the guards would come
and throw him out of the castle now.  But Relena took both of Heero's grimy
hands in her own and kissed both his sooty cheeks.  "Its settled then," she
said.  "We'll have the wedding tomorrow."

"But," said Heero, "You want to marry me, even if I look like this?"

"Of course I do, silly," said the Princess.  "I can always clean you up
again!"

And so it was.  Heero was married to Princess Relena the very next day, and
they lived happily ever after.

The End.

--------------------------------------

Duo: Why?  Why?!?!  Why am I so evil in this fic?
Quatre: Well, we were the 'evil step-sisters'...
Duo:  *wails* Noooooooo!

Sorry about that guys.  ^_^;;;;;;

Sachie