The Inner Man’s daily P.E

By Shevey

“Ever so slowly does he slip out of the bushes, a night breeze brushes his smooth metal comrade.  Vengeance seeks the air. Yes, he knows it; tonight is his night of victory. No one can escape his mass of wrath. He. Knows. No. Mercy.”  Slowly, the pilot breathes in and out, contracting his abs to smooth down the knots. Butterflies?

Slowly, his Zero glides in and out of the trees all while he dictates every move of the battle before he finds his enemy- or at least one of them.

Heero hears a rumbled to his right, which could either be two things: A, Duo’s stomach, or B, the “enemy. Ah, objective? Get around the bush before the sound comes closer. Mission… accepted.”

With a quick dive of silence, Heero maneuvers Zero behind a group of trees and waits in a shaky breath as the thundering ‘thunders’ closer.  At first it was hard to tell, but Heero’s trained eyes caught on to the sheer black metal that was moving against the black sky.  Heero ran a hand through his strands of chocolate desires that bathed his head in no particular sequence. Maybe it was from lack of ownership of a hairbrush; he preferred to think of it as…. mysterious. So, perfect solider like.

Sighing with content, he turns his attention back to the ‘issue’ at hand, narrating every move the other one makes.

“He moves, captivated by his own stupidity as all Americans do. He doesn’t anticipate the mystifying, lethal, fatal dark angel around the trees. He sights, he dives,  he moves, he runs, he…” 

“TAG! Your it!!!” Heero stood there dumbfounded as he watched Duo, or should we say Deathscythe tally across the open field like a clown on fire. Heero says the only logical thing that comes to mind, “Huh?” It only takes Duo’s laugh to slap him across the face before he form words. 

“What? How? Cheater!” Heero accused. He hadn’t gotten to the point where he could make sentences. The shock was too much. How could Duo have possibly known where he was? He had been so smooth, so precise, so mysterious…so…dark angel like. 

“Cheater?” Duo’s face popped up on the screen. “Heero buddy, you should really turn off your intercom.” 

Heero ignored the heat that flared up his neck and blotched his cheeks. With only a beep to signalize, Wufie’s face popped up on the screen as well. “Dark angel? Can you get anymore original than that?” 

“That’s it. Current mission. To beat the living hell out of you guys.” 

“No, the deal was tag with your saber beam. That’s it.” Quatre’s justifying voice came through the intercom reciting an almost fairness to all goodwill. 

“Tag my ass. I’m going to tag your gundams to the ground.” Heero pushed a few random buttons on his dashboard wondering when he would ever get around to asking Doctor J what exactly they do. For now, he figured it was for show. Taunt fingers dashing across random buttons that light up before he goes to the big fight.

 “Ooh,” it gave him goose bumps.

“What? We’re playing rugby now?” Trowa asked with a hint of sarcasm; however, there was a true question in his inquirment. With these guys, you never do know what they have planned.

Heero smirked as he tossed up Relena’s pink car from her courtyard and caught it with a loud echo. “Better.” Slowly his smirk faded into a challenging glare. With his famous ‘monotone’ voice, he added with a hint of dark amusement. “We’re playing football.”

Quickly, he threw the car over to Wufie, where his gundam had its arms open for the retrireview. He caught it no problem, ignoring the fact that the silver bumper was now detached and gray. With that, the five ‘boys’ were off into their field, all listening to Heero’s narration at the same time.

 “Number 01 is off again, dodges 03, and comes for the pass from Nataku, pilot 05. He jumps in the air, glides, everyone stops to watch, the car comes in slow motion like and…” Zero catches the car and dives into the large patch of pink flowers before Duo could tackle him. “TOUCHDOWN BY THE WONDERFUL, MYSTERIOUS, FATAL…. DARK ANGEL!”

 The four boys all stared as Zero did its victory dance, sending all the pretty, innocent pink flowers to their deathbeds.

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I was inspired by the choking hazards on chocolate soy milk. I know I've been gone for ages so I guess this is a peace-treaty to make up for it! Please review, have a nice day and don't choke on chocolate soy milk (they're dangerous but sinfully delicious)